Ok, well, her pseudodragon, anyway.

So here’s the deal: I’m playing Dungeons and Dragons on October 25th as part of the Wizards of the Coast D&D Extra Life team. Extra Life is a wonderful DIY sort of fundraising project – it gives anyone and everyone the tools to put together a 25* hour gaming marathon to raise money for The Children’s Miracle Network. It’s an awesome cause, with participants around the world raising millions of dollars to help kids.

To do all this, we’re playing a D&D game with one DM, Greg Bilsland, and a rotation of players. Those of us playing are offering various incentives to encourage donations, from determining what characters we play to winning prizes. The team will also be giving out prizes on the day of the event, and you can tune in for a chance at those and to watch us play, at twitch.tv/dnd, starting at 8am on October 25.

I’ll be playing from 8am – 4pm. Below, thanks to many generous donors, are details of just what my character looks like so far.

*Because of daylight savings. There are going to be some tiiiiiired gamers on the 26th.

—– Who am I? —–

Here’s what has been determined about my character thus far:

• My name was chosen by Lord Hosk. I am to be Generic Hero of the High-Elk Clan. (Say the second half of that and then say my last name right afterwards – that’s deliberate.)Lord Hosk also wrote an entire theme song for my character, which I will share at the bottom of this post, so be sure to check that out.
• Matt G. decided that I will be a weregoat (like a satyr or werewolf, but half human and half goat). This way, he explains, I can headbutt people for fun. I like the way this guy thinks.
• Jacob J. has determined that I will be a monk.
• Mark R. chose a battlecry for me. As I race into the fray I will shout “For the honour of Lord Mathias!” There’s definitely gonna be a little in-game backstory there.This was chosen in honour of a Mark’s friend’s birthday, and I love the fact that Matthias also happens to be the name of my younger brother. Perfect all round.
• From Serge Y., a delightfully thematic flaw: due to being at least semi covered in goat hair, I am cold-blooded. Raised in the arctic, I just can’t stand the heat. This could be great if we find ourselves in cooler climes, but less good in warm seasons or heated castles.
• Jacob J. also gave me the ideal Shield of the Cradle, which states: you go out of your way to help children and others you perceive as defenseless, whatever that may entail.

—– Something plushie this way comes —–

As I explain on my Extra Life page, I also asked our DM permission to have an animal companion, regardless of my character’s class. He agreed, so I let people donate to cast votes on what type of creature it would be, selecting from a list. Here are the results of the voting:

• A vote for pigeon was cast by Matt G., which is quite amusing as, in the first D&D game I played with Greg as a DM, my character ended up with a pigeon friend (who got turned into pigeon-shaped gelatin).
• An anonymous voter cast 2 votes for giant snail, with the caveat (craveat?) that it must wear a bow tie and a fancy hat.
• Daniel N. cast 1 vote for pseudodragon and 1 vote for cat.
• Greg Bilsland, our DM, cast a vote for pseudodragon (it’s like he’s plotting something…)
• Jacob J. cast a total of 10 votes for pseudodragon.

So as you can see, pseudodragon won the day very handily!

Additionally, Emma T. donated to name the pseudodragon Binky.

Now, as the second part of this companionship plan, I am making a plush pseudodragon, which I will take to the game and wear on my shoulder. After the game, each person who voted on the creature will have their name put into a hat (once for each vote they donated for), and I will draw a name and send that person the plushie!

A special thank you also to Aaron M., Marc M. and Peter C. for their generous donations. All these donations have also added up to help my character get some extra perks to start the game with, from additional healing potions and supplies, to an automatic natural 20 and a random wondrous item.

—– Pictures, pictures, pictures —–

You may know that when I make plush things, I often like taking silly, goofy, entertaining and just plain fun pictures with them. Like the Cthulhu d’awwwtagn plush marauding through a town of Lego people. Or the kobolds being eaten by a baby, or me being eaten by Creepy Dolls, or the adventures of two furball cavemen and a cat.

Well I’m going to do a fun photoshoot with Binky the pseudodragon before he is sent away, and I’ll make that shoot into a blog post, along with behind-the-scenes pictures of the making of Binky. It’ll be a secret, hidden blog post, but everyone who donates any amount to my Extra Life campaign will get access to it!

So if you’ve got $5 between the couch cushions, you can donate that for an amusing post detailing the Secret Adventures of Binky the Pseudodragon. It’ll be awesome.

—– It’s not over yet! —–

The fun continues up through October 25th, when we’ll be actually playing this game. You can still donate towards more general character perks, determinations like character class, getting me to mail you a postcard after the game that’s written in character, and being privy to the fun little photoshoot I’ll do with Binky the pseudodragon before sending him off to a new home. And every cent of it goes to help sick kids!

You can donate here!

—– And now, a song —–

Generic Hero of the High-Elk Clan’s theme song, written by Lord Hosk
to be sung to the tune of (to the theme of Juke box hero by Foreigner)

Standing in the rain, with her head hung low
Couldn’t get away , she was sold to-a Troll
Heard the roar of the goat, she tried to flee the scene
But she was chain to the wall, then she let out a scream

She saw one broadsword, and slew to get away
She saw stars in her eyes, and the very next day
Bought some beat up chainmail at the town blacksmith
Didn’t know how to wear it, but she knew for sure

That one broadsword, felt good in her hands
Didn’t take long, to understand
Just one broadsword, slung way down low
Was one way ticket, only one way to go

So she started Slaying
Ain’t never gonna stop
Gotta keep on killin’
Someday she’s gonna make it to the top

She is Generic Hero, got horns on her head
She is Generic hero
She took one broadsword, Generic hero, got horns on her head
Generic hero, of the High-elk Clan!

In a town without a name, in a heavy downpour
Thought she passed her own shadow, by the tavern door
Like a trip through the past, to that day in the rain
And that one broadsword made her whole life change

So she started Slaying
Ain’t never gonna stop
Gotta keep on killin’
Someday she’s gonna make it to the top

And be the Generic hero, With horns on her head
Shes Generic hero, with horns on her head
Yeah, Generic hero, with horns on her head
With that one broadsword she’ll stay alive
Stay alive tonight